Every year the Academy awards show is televised to a huge audience. For 2011 viewership was 37.6 million. For weeks prior to the show itself we are inundated with shows and news segments devoted to guessing who will be nominated and after nominations are announced who was snubbed and who should win. I haven't checked, but I'm sure you can bet on who will win in any Las Vegas casino. On the day of the big event entire shows are dedicated to judging the stars as they arrive. The insults fly here including who's hair looks like it was styled in a blender and who's make up was done by a blind monkey. Of course which stick figure shaped star is wearing which famous designer is of utmost importance. And the shoes! How can she wear those with that dress?
And the awards are numerous to say the least. Not just best movie, best actor, best actress, but hundreds of others as thrilling as best screen play adapted from a comic book, best sound editing in a documentary and best costume design in a nudist colony movie. For people in the movie industry that's fine, but for everyone else - WHO GIVES A CRAP?
It's an industry awards show! Would you watch an awards show for seatbelt makers, or widget designers or brick makers? NO - no one gives a rat's ass (of course no one wants to receive a rat's ass either). As long as my seatbelt works a drunken sea monkey could have been the award winning designer. As long as the bricks of my house don't crumble an elephant could have hand crafted them from her own dung. I DON'T CARE! And neither should you. It's got nothing to do with you.
And the show itself? I can imagine that being forced to endure these boring hours would be a prime punishment in Hell. first we get one or two celebrities who can't resist the spotlight to host the show. they alternate uninspired, boring lines with introductions to a bevy of 20 second long snippets of movie performances. After each snippet the camera focuses on the individual featured hoping for some reaction to seeing themselves. Possibly smiling, possibly acting non chalant, or maybe picking their nose.
Finally we must endure the the winners' speeches. A stultifying minute or two filled with thanks to everyone in the known universe ending with the charming yet unimaginative comment telling the children that now they have to go to bed. I guess loser's children get to stay up all night.
All of this evening was created just because some clever hollywoodians said "If we dress up the actors and actresses really nice we can sell advertising and make some bucks."
Movies can certainly be entertaining. The overall experience created by talented groups of people can can elicit a great range of emotions. But to claim interest in the mundane aspects of creating a movie? Come on! But don't pretend to care unless you can watch a movie and honestly say afterwards things like
"Wow-what great editing, it really made the movie"
Or
"Look at those caveman outfits , they are so authentic looking. If it wasn't for the costume designer this movie would blow!"
Or
"Man, the sound engineer was amazing. If those explosions were 5 decibels lower I would hate this movie"
Yes, creating a movie requires many talented people working as a team on many aspects. THEY should care about their product and honor their peers. But you aren't one of them, so just go watch a movie and enjoy.
